First off, I’d like to apologize for how little this blog has gotten into the spirit of the spoo-oo-ookiest season of the year. Granted, Gordon wrote up another of his annual Halloween movie rec lists, but apart from that we haven’t really delved into the macabre at all. That’s why I figured that now was as good a time as any for the most terrifying topic among those that I’ve been meaning to cover: the existence of a 2 Broke Girls porn parody.
Now at the time of this writing a 2 Broke Girls porn parody does not, in fact, exist. Googling that search term mostly just brings up this video-
-which I have a problem with based on the fact that, hey, everyone knows that Han is Korean and Oleg is Ukrainian! I mean, do your research, people. My self-appointed role as the internet’s foremost 2 Broke Girls-ologist aside we should probably get to discussing exactly why that is. No, not why a 2 Broke Girls porn parody is needed [it’s not, also, you know why], but why one doesn’t exist.
I Did Actual Porn Parody Research For This
I did not do an extensive amount of actual porn parody research for this, though. Wikipedia had 27 pages for the category “Pornographic parody films”, and of those I selected only three based on TV shows that I have at least a passing familiarity with, alongside one other. I’m going to be spotlighting them from oldest to newest in terms of the original program.
First up is Seinfeld: A XXX Parody, released in 2009 by porn film studio New Sensations. Here are the facts [all math cobbled together from information found on the shows’ respective Wikipedia pages]:
- Seinfeld premiered in 1989 and concluded in 1998. It ran for a total of nine seasons.
- The average Nielsen Rating over the course of all nine seasons was 17.7, meaning that on average 17.7% of all household with TVs watched this show live as it aired.
- There was a gap of 11 years between the end of this show and the creation of its porn parody.
- Having scanned the plot synopsis on Wikipedia I can assure you all that the porn parody does not have “Jorge” engage in any sexual acts on screen.