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Readers, I’m sick.

Sick of the repellent terror attacks in France, sick of the vile reaction many have had to it, sick of the endless cycle of violence, misinformation, and Islamophobia.

I’m also literally sick.

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There will never, in the history of man, exist a better encapsulation of what it feels like to be sick.

And it is for that reason and that reason alone that you will be spared my inevitable torrent of righteous/self-righteous indignation- for this week, anyways. Buckle up, kids- next Monday we’re going to be ripping apart the following individuals with the kind of viciousness not typically seen outside of a Gareth Evans movie.

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Our punching bags will be as follows:

Donald Trump, Ben Carson, Rick Snyder, and the spineless, xenophobic, dirtbag governors of Alabama, Arizona, Arkansas, Florida, Georgia, Illinois, Indiana, Iowa, Louisiana, Massachusetts, Mississippi, New Hampshire, North Carolina, Ohio, Texas, and Wisconsin- all of whom have issued refusals over the past 48-hours to allow the settlement Syrian refugees within their borders.

There will be blood.

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Explaining American Politics To Non-Americans – Part I: Why We’re ****ed

It’s been my ambition for some time now to dedicate a series to explaining American politics to our substantial audience of non-Americans. While this blog is comprised 50% of Canadians (our frosty neighbors north of the wall), the simple fact of the matter is that the land-the-free has long been the front line of culture war. What happens here affects the rest of the globe.

With the already hotly contested primaries underway and prospects for the 2016 election being widely debated, what better time could there be than now to explain just why it is that we the people are fundamentally screwed.

Let me break it down here.

I. The Person Who Wins Isn’t Always The Person Who Gets Elected

In spite of our praise for democracy, the American republic does not have a one-man-one-vote policy. Every four years, there’s a decent chance that the candidate with the most votes will still lose to his opponent.

See, we have something called the “electoral college”- a staggeringly complex system that not even this succinct TED video can completely cover. At its simplest, the system boils down to states having “points” assigned to them on the basis of their populations and number of congressmen and senators.

This system means that a political candidate doesn’t necessarily have to get a massive number of people to vote for him- just a majority. So long as he or she gets that majority, no matter how slim, they still takes away as many “points” as if they had won a landslide.

What that means is that a person can get elected president in spite of his or her opponent getting more actual votes. Just look at this image below:

While the majority of votes cast in this example are blue, red still wins by virtue of this system. While supposedly protecting states with smaller populations (preventing them from being drowned out by heavily populated states), the result is that a person’s vote can very well be rendered utterly pointless. Plenty of folks simply don’t even bother voting, especially in states dominated by one party. Alternatively, states with greater electoral power (more points, that is) and a habit of swinging between parties (Ohio and Florida, most famously) get disproportionate amounts of attention.

In spite of being viciously despised by folks on both sides of the political spectrum, there’s really very little hope for any reform on this point. While part of that can be blamed on tradition, plenty of it also boils down to a little thing called- Continue reading