It has been 51 days since Drumpf became president, and I lock the door to my apartment for the final time. It’s a cold day in March, but even my thick coat raises eyebrows as I arrive at the station.
They say Mussolini made the trains run on time, but I’m guessing the strange intricacies that seem to govern the Greyhound buses would’ve sent tears running down the fat, doughy face of the Italian despot. My ticket reads 5:30 to Chicago, No. 302, but the sun is already starting to rise over the desert. All the seats have been taken. I find myself a free spot of ground beneath a leering poster of the president. The bitter morning wind, reeking of diesel fumes and cigarette ash, sends loose papers skittering across the concrete. Discarded ticket stubs, crumpled receipts- a single page that looks like it may have come from some shoolboy’s essay. All decadent, unpatriotic schools have been replaced with Drumpf Universities, where we are to be re-educated to stop thinking like “bimbos” and “losers.”
An hour passes, and the guards return- weak, winter sunlight glittering off of their glossy, golden uniforms. They have proper haircuts- as we all do now. Aryan blonde, brushed forward to cover the parts of our head that absolutely aren’t balding. Any illicit hairstyles will earn you and your barber 80 lashings. They takes measurements our hands, to ensure their proper size. They search my belongings. I’ve prepared for this. Just enough clothes for a three day trip. No money. No passport. Just my mandatory certificate proving native birth and authorized religious beliefs. My papers say that I am going to Houghton to visit a sick friend. I am lucky that I already have documents that show I went to college there- at least, to the Houghton in New York. I do not think I could have afforded to have all my papers forged. Continue reading
Posted in America, bizarreness, Canada, Europe, Islam, morality, news, politics, religion
Tagged America, bigotry, Canada, Daesh, Donald Drumpf, Drumpf, Europe, Immigrants, immigration, ISIS, Islam, Islamophobia, Migrants, news, racism, refugees, satire, Trump, Violence
EDITOR’S NOTE: We end this year by each taking a look back and picking our five best posts, explaining both their importance to us and to the world we currently live in. Clicking the banner images will link you to each post, so as 2015 comes to a close join us in remembering how far we’ve come, but also how far we still have to go.
Somewhere in our collective history someone decided to depict God as a bearded, old human, dwelling in the clouds above. The trend caught on and has been going strong for the past couple millennia. As ubiquitous as this portrayal of the almighty has become, we argue that this imagery is the root of some of the worst theology (and art, music, and video) out there today, and how problematic it’s become for both the believer and non-believer alike.
Few images have so perfectly captured the abject and hellish misery of war than this year’s photograph of the body of Aylan Kurdi- only 3 years old. A would-be refugee from the ongoing conflict in Syria, Aylan and his brother drowned after an overcrowded boat capsized during a desperate attempt to reach Europe. The photograph evokes the deepest feelings of sadness for the dead and sympathy for the living- but crucially missing from the emotional equation is anger. Read on to discover why pity for refugees simply doesn’t cut it. Continue reading
Posted in America, bizarreness, blog news, Christianity, internet, lgbt, morality, news, politics
Tagged 2015, America, Christianity, Culture Wars, dead children, death penalty, Dzhokhar Tsarnaev, gay marriage, God, in review, Jesus Christ, Portrayal, refugees, unisex bathrooms
I believe in America.
I believe that the defining characteristic of this nation was its unerring sense of moral conviction- that all we did was in the advancement of some great work set into motion by ages past. That every undertaking stemmed from the deepest confidence in the simple rightness of our cause.
This faith led us, countless times, to commit terrible acts that damn the conscious of the nation. Slavery and Wounded Knee. Manzanar and Kandahar. McDonald’s and McCarthy. It’s led to the popular image abroad of Americans as fundamentally arrogant; loudly voicing their opinions without being asked, demanding where they have no right, interfering where they have no business.
And it was this same faith that has pulled this nation back every time. Yosemite and Normandy. Harlem and Harper’s Ferry. John Muir and Eugene Debs. The faith that sent millions to these shores from every corner of the world and the same unabashed confidence that sent American music, art, film, and literature back.
In spite of our divisions and our failings- and they are neither minor nor few- we are united by the common belief that our cause is not merely just but justice itself, and that its triumph needs only ingenuity, passion, and will to be secured.
For good or ill, it is this value that made America. Continue reading
Posted in America, bizarreness, Europe, government, history, Islam, morality, news, politics
Tagged 9/11, America, art, Background, beliefs, Congress, Conviction, Culture, Curb, Governors, HR 4038, Iraqi, IS, ISIS, Liberty, literature, Manifest Destiny, morality, refugees, Refuse, Representatives, SAFE Act, security, Syria, United States, Values
Readers, I’m sick.
Sick of the repellent terror attacks in France, sick of the vile reaction many have had to it, sick of the endless cycle of violence, misinformation, and Islamophobia.
I’m also literally sick.
There will never, in the history of man, exist a better encapsulation of what it feels like to be sick.
And it is for that reason and that reason alone that you will be spared my inevitable torrent of righteous/self-righteous indignation- for this week, anyways. Buckle up, kids- next Monday we’re going to be ripping apart the following individuals with the kind of viciousness not typically seen outside of a Gareth Evans movie.
Our punching bags will be as follows:
Donald Trump, Ben Carson, Rick Snyder, and the spineless, xenophobic, dirtbag governors of Alabama, Arizona, Arkansas, Florida, Georgia, Illinois, Indiana, Iowa, Louisiana, Massachusetts, Mississippi, New Hampshire, North Carolina, Ohio, Texas, and Wisconsin- all of whom have issued refusals over the past 48-hours to allow the settlement Syrian refugees within their borders.
There will be blood.
Posted in America, bizarreness, blog news, Europe, government, Islam, morality, race, religion
Tagged Alabamba, Arizona, Arkansas, Ben Carson, Donald Trump, Florida, Georgia, Illinois, indianna, Iowa, Louisianna, Massachsetts, Michigan, Mississippi, New Hampshire, North Carolina, paris, refugees, Rick Snyder, Syria, Syrian, Texas, Wisconsin
As you already know, June 26th saw the US Supreme Court’s ruling in Obergefell v. Hodges- an agonizingly boring name for what was one of the most momentous decisions in American legal history.
Effectively legalizing same-sex marriage in all 50 states, the ruling was met by many Americans with resounding applause and celebration that often seemed to border on being downright aggressive.
But we’re not here to talk about that. Nor are we here to talk about the outcries and horror and disgust from the ever-dwindling minority of marriage equality opponents. At least- not the nutjobs.
The pastor who promised to set himself on fire if the ruling was made (though he swiftly retracted that oath), the folks claiming that gays cause hurricanes, the ones who hold up picket signs reading “God hates Fags!”-
-these are not the people I want to talk about.
I’m referring to the non-crazy (but by no means less angry) rank and file of the opposition here. Your conservative uncle. Your Wesleyan Aunt. Folks who’d never shriek obscenities, or claim the impending wrath of God, but who’d still shake their heads sadly and call this ruling a “tragedy” or “evidence of our culture’s moral free-fall”.
Posted in America, Christianity, environmentalism, family, government, internet, lgbt, morality, news, politics, religion
Tagged Christian, Christianity, Christians, church, envinromentalism, Facebook, gay, gay marriage, homosexuality, least of your brothers, obergefell v hodges, persecution, poor, poverty, Public Religion Research Institute, reactions, refugees, same sex marriage, SCOTUS, slavery, status, Supreme Court, USA, verses, western, widows and orphas
Don’t get me wrong, these guys are evil bastards, and while they’re brutal, destructive, and genocidal, that’s probably all they’ll ever be, and they won’t be that for long.
Let me break it down here.
I. Everyone Hates ‘Em
And I mean everyone- not just those unfortunate enough to be targeted by the group. See, the moment these guys came to power in Syria, they enacted a couple social policies, namely, the banning of music and smoking. And readers, let me tell ya, if there’s two things Syrians love, it’s music…
Posted in crime, government, Islam, money, music, news, politics
Tagged attack, Baghdad, ban, Dam, Fear, Infrastructure, ISIS, ISL, Kurd, Kurdish, Kurds, Mosul, music, Oil, organization, refugees, smoking, State, Syria, terrorist, Tribesmen, vaccine