When I first attempted to write this post, several months ago, I titled it “the real reason Nicholas Sparks is the worst”. I was planning to discuss the lawsuit against Nicholas Sparks that has accused him of being racist, antisemitic, and homophobic in the workplace. I then planned to use that as a lead-in to discuss how romance novels are just awful in general.
Something about that original post just never feel right. Maybe it’s because I have no way of knowing if Sparks is really guilty of what he has been accused, or maybe it’s because any time I start to attack the Romance genre I find myself haunted by the memory of Jane Austen.
This is what you find when you search for “Jane Austen” and “ghost”.
Posted in feminism, film, literature, relationships, writing
Tagged After Hours, angry, Ann Radcliffe, bbc, Colin Firth, cracked, creepy, domestic struggles, Elizabeth Bennett, female protagonist, genre, Gothic Romance, Jane Austen, Jezebel, Jodi Picoult, love, marriage, marry, Mr Darcy, Nicholas Sparks, Pride and Prejudice and Zombies, protofeminist, pushy, romance, romantic, romantic comedy, self determination, the Notebook, the Romance Novel, trailblazer
Roughly six years ago I sat in a guest house in London, England, and complained to a Korean friend about not being attractive. It’s funny seeing it typed out now, and it wasn’t so starkly apparent at the time, but that’s exactly what I was worried about. We were studying abroad with a group of mostly White classmates from a predominantly White liberal arts college, and as an eighteen-year-old I had dating on the mind. That, and the beginnings of the idea that things might not be so easy for me given the colour of my skin.
And unlike John Cho and his suit, my skin does not peel away to reveal more equally-good-looking skin underneath.
My primary source was media and pop culture, and how interracial relationships weren’t showcased much, if at all [not much has changed, 2009!]. I suggested that this might create a life-imitating-art situation, where young non-hyphenated-American women might not be as open to the idea of getting together with an Asian guy due to never seeing it on screens small or large. He brought up that he’d had no problems in the past [being musical, and with that bone structure?], as well as the more damning evidence that neither had I. With that I left the topic of conversation alone, not entirely convinced or at peace with the whole thing.
Posted in film, media, race, relationships, television
Tagged #selfie, 2 Broke Girls, ABC, asian, attractive, desirable, diversity, film, Glenn, Han, hot, John Cho, Korean, Maggie, Portrayal, race, representation, revolutionary, role, romantic, sitcom, Sung Kang, The Walking Dead, TV
How do I love thee? Let me count the ways. There’s, uh, hugging, obviously, and holding hands . . . there’s hanging out and talking of course . . . I can, uh, tell you that I love you, that seems pretty straightforward . . . write you some poetry, maybe? I feel like that’s probably a pretty good list already.
Oh, uh, kissing? Well, uh . . .
Maybe back when I was 15-years-old or so I decided, purely on a whim, to not kiss until I knew I was going to marry the person I was locking lips with, while I was casually talking on the phone with my then-girlfriend. A decision that could, in all likelihood, lead to something more or less like this:
Posted in bizarreness, Christianity, morality, relationships, religion, sex, Youth
Tagged base, Christian, Christianity, dating, engagement, first kiss, intimacy, kiss, kissing, make out, marriage, osculation, personal, physical, premarital, purity, relationship, romantic, sex, sin, smooch, snog, temptation, Valentine's Day post, virgin, wedding day