In spite of what has been the single nastiest election in American history (yes, ever) many folks are already turning their bloodshot eyes to the 2020 election.
(Assuming we’re not all dead or in internment camps, obviously.)
“Will he? Won’t he?”
That’s the question folks are asking themselves.
In spite of Biden’s declaration, it’s still unclear if Biden actually will run in 2020. Which hasn’t stopped countless hopefuls from working themselves into a frenzy.
Posted in America, government, history, news, politics
Tagged 2020, Biden, democrat, election, fans, gaff, hawk, internet, Iraq War, israel, issues, Joe Biden, Joseph Biden, Mass Incarceration, Mass Surveillance, meme, memes, Neoliberalism, Policies, president, The Onion, Trump, Vice President, War on Drugs
Readers,
We have entered at last into that special time of year. Halls are decked, trees are festooned, and yours truly is unleashing another one of his Grinch-y rants about how much I hate Christmas.
Or at least, I would be.
I’d like to try something a bit different this year. Maybe actually try to give all this holly-jolly bull**** a chance. So, in an attempt to get into the grotesque Capitalist travesty that this is month of crass commercialism “holiday spirit”, I figured I’d put together a little list of some things we’d like to have.
I. A World Leader Who Isn’t A ****ing ***hole
Ever since Uruguayan president Jose Mujica stepped down in 2015 there’s been a stocky, ex-guerilla shaped hole in our hearts that we just can’t seem to fill.
Ideally one with such an absolute commitment to the poor that he or she serves as an example, forgoing the perks of their station, but honestly, we’ll take what we can get.
II. A George Carlin Grill
“You mean a George Foreman Grill?”
No, I mean a George Carlin Grill. As in I want to have George Carlin hanging around so he can apply some fiery, incandescent rage to the great, gooey mass that is human stupidity.
“You want to resurrect George Carlin? Isn’t that asking a bit much?”
Seeing as how this country’s managed to resurrect the ****ing Nazi movement, no, I don’t think it is. Continue reading
Well folks, it happened. In a move that continues to shock the world, Britain has dramatically voted to leave the European Union.
And make no mistake readers- the Brexit is the worst thing that has ever happened. Or the best thing. Or…
Well, something.
For all the outrage, jubilation, and wild speculation, the reality of the situation is that most folks have been caught off guard by this decision- and probably none moreso than folks on this side of the Atlantic.
Plenty of conservatives- including potential American president Donald Trump- have applauded the Brexit, claiming it to be a victory for small government, autonomy, and “making Britain great again.”
Which is something that should probably concern the rest of the world…
On the other hand, liberals have been howling that the Brexit represents a secession not simply from Europe but from progressive values, freedom of movement, and a commitment to peace and unity in general.
With all that noise, dear readers, it can be tough to hear the truth.
And unfortunately, we don’t have it either. The reality is that this is an absurdly complicated issue with far-reaching implications and plenty of ramifications that we can only guess at. So rather than add to the din, we here at Culture War Reporters have gathered the most pertinent issues for your own consideration. Continue reading
Posted in bizarreness, Europe, geography, government, Islam, news, politics, race, Travel, Youth
Tagged Brexit, Britain, Catalonia, democracy, EDL, elitist, England, english, EU, European Union, Geert Wilders, ireland, Islamophobia, Jingoist, Marine Le Pen, Nationalism, nationalist, Negatives, northern ireland, Positives, racist, Referendum, Schegen, scotland, Seccession, Sicily, Trump, UK, wales, Xenophobic
It has been 51 days since Drumpf became president, and I lock the door to my apartment for the final time. It’s a cold day in March, but even my thick coat raises eyebrows as I arrive at the station.
They say Mussolini made the trains run on time, but I’m guessing the strange intricacies that seem to govern the Greyhound buses would’ve sent tears running down the fat, doughy face of the Italian despot. My ticket reads 5:30 to Chicago, No. 302, but the sun is already starting to rise over the desert. All the seats have been taken. I find myself a free spot of ground beneath a leering poster of the president. The bitter morning wind, reeking of diesel fumes and cigarette ash, sends loose papers skittering across the concrete. Discarded ticket stubs, crumpled receipts- a single page that looks like it may have come from some shoolboy’s essay. All decadent, unpatriotic schools have been replaced with Drumpf Universities, where we are to be re-educated to stop thinking like “bimbos” and “losers.”
An hour passes, and the guards return- weak, winter sunlight glittering off of their glossy, golden uniforms. They have proper haircuts- as we all do now. Aryan blonde, brushed forward to cover the parts of our head that absolutely aren’t balding. Any illicit hairstyles will earn you and your barber 80 lashings. They takes measurements our hands, to ensure their proper size. They search my belongings. I’ve prepared for this. Just enough clothes for a three day trip. No money. No passport. Just my mandatory certificate proving native birth and authorized religious beliefs. My papers say that I am going to Houghton to visit a sick friend. I am lucky that I already have documents that show I went to college there- at least, to the Houghton in New York. I do not think I could have afforded to have all my papers forged. Continue reading
Don Lemon.
Our more dedicated readers will remember we wrote about the CNN news anchor back in November, and by “wrote about him”, I of course mean “launched into a detailed tirade about what an spineless, amoral sleazebag the guy is“.
Yeah, we weren’t gentle with that one…
Now as we’ve said before, there’s plenty of folks out in the news who lack integrity. Those folks- your Piers Morgans, your Glenn Becks, your Keith Olbermanns- are plenty nasty, don’t get me wrong, but they’re at least motivated by some agenda. You can generally count on ’em to focus their bile in a precise direction or at specific targets.
No such luxury with Don Lemon.
Don Lemon- as he himself would tell you- isn’t tied down to any one perspective or set of politics. One day, he’s speculating to whether or not a black hole was the cause of the disappearance of Malaysian Airlines Flight 370. Or one day, he’s asking one of Cosby’s alleged rape victims why she didn’t just bite the guy’s penis. Or he’s endorsing the patently racist and unconstitutional practice of “stop-and-frisk”, and telling folks they have to choose between dignity and security. There’s really no rhyme or reason to it. The dude’s got the earnestness of Walter Cronkite and the journalistic ethics of the Daily Mirror.
You stay classy, Great Britain…
Posted in America, bizarreness, celebrity, history, media, morality, news, television
Tagged bigotry, Black Hole, civil rights, cnn, Cosby, Deabte, Don Lemon, Donald Trump, ethics, Glenn Beck, Illegal Immigration, interview, Jesse Jackson, Jouranlism, Keith Olbermann, Latin America, Malaysian Airlines Flight 370, Mexico, Muckraker, n word, news, Obama, offensive, Peirs Morgan, race, racism, racist, rape, Statistics, stop and frisk, The Young Turks, Trump
 | Evan on The “One Size Fits All… |
 | Phi on The “One Size Fits All… |
| ‘Nimble Fingers’ Rac… on Lisa Nakamura Part 2: Navajo C… | |
 | abdessamed gtumsila on Colonial Williamsburg: A Cultu… |
 | T on Is “Art of Manliness… |
Culture War Reporters 